How do I stay sober?

Your Question: I've been in and out of 12-step support group meetings for nearly 2 and a half years, but something doesn't stick with me. I relapse too often. The fellowship thing seems to work for a lot of people, but that aspect of it isn't a big deal for me - I'm introverted. I know you don't have enough details for a custom solution, but what would you advise for someone who struggles with the liquid addiction that the fellowship of support groups doesn't seem to help? Any response is appreciated. I know you've studied spiritual psychology and may have a unique perspective that may help. Thank you for your time.

Hi! Thank you for your question. There is a book that I recommend when asked about overcoming addiction. It’s called “The Little Book of Change” written by Amy Johnson. You can get it on Amazon. She teaches the “Three Principals” approach which I do as well. This involves observing your thoughts and understanding that just because we have certain thoughts (such as I need a drink) that doesn’t mean we have to act on them. I’ve also seen people I know drink fake beer instead of the real thing because they like the taste and that’s helped them to stay off the booze. How badly do you want to quit? That may be a question you want to ask yourself. If the answer is very badly then make it your number one priority. Do the work it takes to give it up. Read the book, stay away from situations where you are bound to fail. Bring the fake beer with you to parties or restaurants as my friend does if you aren’t sure they will have it there. Are you religious? If so pray for support. Hang around people who uplift you and support this effort. You say you relapse too often but are you doing so less and less? If so good for you, and let’s celebrate that! Are you really engaging in your support groups or could you go a little more often or be a bit more invested? You mentioned they don’t stick for you but if you haven’t truly believed they would work, then they won’t. I’m inviting you to wake up in the morning and write down 3 thing you are going to do that day to manifest your goal of sobriety. Maybe read parts of a spiritual book, exercise, meditate, do yoga, pray, make a journal about your sobriety journey, make a new friend who is positive and supportive or make plans with one you already have. Go to a meeting with a positive mind set! If you beat yourself up about falling off the wagon you will probably do it more often. Be good to yourself. Praise yourself for how far you’re come, You’re worth it!  Good luck and please keep me posted.